Constipation and You!

[â?? Jesus Christ â??]

Hey everyone, I need to boost my post count so I decided to post about a serious problem I've been having over the past 6 months. Everyday when I return home from school my bowels begin to roar, and I mean roar. Like my whole body feels like a volcano about to erupt, and I'm never sure which end its going to come out. So I sit down on the throne for a good hour and the worst thing happens, nothing comes out. On some stretches I go an entire week without dropping a load, which is insane considering I consume a good 2600 calorie diet. Currently my health care does not cover the cost of constipation therapy offered at my doctors office so I decided to turn you guys, I'm sure a few of you have some answers. How can I solve my constipation? Thanks y'all.

P.S. Don't worry I have a laptop so I don't lose a ton of productivity during my time on the throne, and by productivity I mean srs gaming on catalyst hl2rp.

[Globey]

Wrong section, moved.

Consult a doctor, first and foremost. You're not paying for the knowledge, you're paying for the judgement. Although you might not be able to afford therapy, speak to your doctor about a course of anti-biotic or enzymatic treatment. There's a good chance that it's an imbalance in the enzymes in the small intestine, or bacteria cultures in the large.
If none of the above works, resort to laxatives. Down some molasses, or piles of fruit or whatever. Attempt to incorporate more fiber into your diet. Most North American lifestyles are based around pizza, burgers, or other fast food, and so deprives your body of the fiber it needs to properly function.

Anyways, move to a country with a public health care system. Their economies tend to be better anyways, and there's much more support for everybody.

[Pielolz]

I have the same problem, eat lots of fiber, prunes are good. (not taste) Load up on Ex-Lax.

[PoXiE [Zefux]]

Wrong section, moved.

Consult a doctor, first and foremost. You're not paying for the knowledge, you're paying for the judgement. Although you might not be able to afford therapy, speak to your doctor about a course of anti-biotic or enzymatic treatment. There's a good chance that it's an imbalance in the enzymes in the small intestine, or bacteria cultures in the large.
If none of the above works, resort to laxatives. Down some molasses, or piles of fruit or whatever. Attempt to incorporate more fiber into your diet. Most North American lifestyles are based around pizza, burgers, or other fast food, and so deprives your body of the fiber it needs to properly function.

Anyways, move to a country with a public health care system. Their economies tend to be better anyways, and there's much more support for everybody.

Yeah, listen to him.

Anyways, I feel like a volcano when I eat potatoes... It lasts like 3 minutes but still, its pretty damn annoying.

[Zero]

I used to have a problem with it as well, but then I started to drink way more water and eat healthier foods. It fixed itself.

[Benler]

I've been eating a ton of pizza lately and I've been getting crazy constipation. I should probably lay off the pizza, lest my anus rip open D:

[Wacka]

I don't know if you still have that problem, but Lin seeds really help in that area. Cheers, hope this helps.

[â?? Jesus Christ â??]

Thanks for the tip Chloe, I will try that!

[FPSRussia]

Drink apple juice, I heard it is good when you need to poop, or apple cider.

[MB | Alexx]

I feel like a volcano when I eat potatoes...

Oh god wtf did i just read.