<::|| RCT.523 Private Logs ||::>

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UNIT: 523
DIVISION: UNIFORM
CLEARANCE: RCT

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<::|| It has been a stressful first few days in the Combine Civil Authority for me. I wouldn't exactly say that it was as pleasant as I expected it to be, while there have been some other officers nice enough to assist me during my duties as an RCT, there are others who would rather see the imminent end of me. My very first day on the force after having been accepted, I was forced to witness two amputations in one day. The first amputation was of an individual deemed to be 10-103M. He resisted, so an officer winded up shooting him multiple times in the spine as he was on the ground.

The second, and easily more gruesome amputation was of another 10-103M individual. He had originally run from an OfC and put up quite the fight when we were working to detain him. Eventually he was moved to the treatment center, where he was tied into the electrocution chair. He had a heart attack in the suspense leading up to the event, and the OfC in question shocked his heart back to life. There was a moments pause before he initiated the shock again. This was the worst thing by far that I have been unfortunate enough to witness in the CCA. Time seemed to last hours as the man was electrocuted in that chair, and his face was almost begging me to set him free. I did not move to do anything though. I fear that his face will cause me nightmares for weeks to come.

Prior to this event was something rather shocking however. During my patrol with unit 101, a crowd had formed at the Diordna when we responded to assist a unit making an arrest. It was shocking because most of the crowd figured that they would be able to take on two armed units and an RCT brandishing only a stunstick. It took some effort, and several warning shots from an MP7, but it eventually did the trick and the crowd dispersed.

I will update this log with any future events that strike me mentally, emotionally, or otherwise. ||::>

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[Sectus]

UNIT: 523
DIVISION: UNIFORM
CLEARANCE: RCT

Enter Password: **********

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<::|| I feel that with each passing day I am becoming slightly colder, and less caring about the individual lives of citizens, and their families. With each rebellious citizen that is gunned down by another unit for running, or resisting, I become more tolerant of the hideous way that their mangled bodies impact the pavement. While I am becoming more tolerant, I am still not able to fully shrug off the emotional pain that seeing someone die brings. With each passing day I notice that more and more of my friends from the past are disappearing, either to district six to begin resisting the union, or into the nexus, be it to either join the ranks of Civil Protection, or be consumed in the everlasting maw that is the detainment center.

Today's events passed without much incident, aside from a person suffering from an allergy of some sort that had to be brought into the CWU medical center in district two. It took much effort alongside two NOVA officers, but I had to leave early in order to continue patrolling with another unit. From what I heard over the continuous radio chatter inside my helmet, the man was stabilized and brought back to health. At highest, his temperature read 108.5. This event was really able to make me appreciate the fact that NOVA is indeed an indispensable division to the Combine Civil Authority forces. Though I have already pretty much set my mind on become an APEX unit, I would still like to see GRID in action, to see if I would be better suited for it than APEX.

Most unnerving of all was potentially a meeting with an old man I knew from my days as a citizen named Leuthen. He was in tears over some tragic event that had accosted him earlier that day. I was given permission by unit 929 to move forward, and ask him what was wrong. He said that all he needed was a piece of paper, so I went into the break room to retrieve a piece. Upon coming back, this made him further distraught, with what I can only assume was joy over my kindness. The most unsettling part was that he had known it was me the entire time. I had never suspected that he would know my name just based on my band number. I suppose I should not have referred to him as "Leu" to avoid such unbecoming situations. Either way, the situation was stabilized, and I do not think any other citizens heard him. I prey he does not tell the others. ||::>

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[Sectus]

UNIT: 523
DIVISION: UNIFORM
CLEARANCE: RCT

Enter Password: **********

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<::|| Another sickening, yet eventful day with the Civil Protection forces in City 45. The morning seemed bright, almost cheery when I woke, but at the point I am typing this out, the halls of the nexus are filled with the smell of burning corpses and decaying rot yet again, as it always seems to be at this time of day. Today went as it usually does. I woke up from my bunk (I have personally chosen to live within the confines of the nexus, due to safety reasons) as I always do, headed down and ate our provided breakfast (today's being a treat of dried bacon and eggs) and then began my patrol with 452. All through the morning shift everything seemed casual until some point around noon, we were ordered to begin ration distribution.

Today's would be my fourth time serving in the ration distribution station. The first time I served as Booth 2, second I served as booth 1, third I served as Line Guard, and this was my time again to serve as Booth 2. It went all according to plan until what I can only assume was an anti-citizen walked through. He was given code three, and moved into the detainment section of the RDT. The last I ever saw of the man was him being escorted to the treatment center of the RDT. I do enjoy ration duty as much as I'm sure the citizens do. It breaks the monotony of walking around in circles all day, only to stop and whack a citizen upside the head with a stunstick every now and then. I think ration duty is the only thing keeping me sane at this point.

Last bit of duty for the day, I was instructed to come to the nexus treatment center. Upon arrival I found a man in horrible condition bound to the chair. He had gun wounds in his feet, and slashes all across him. While the man being in a bad condition did not surprise me, as this was the "treatment" room, it was the actual condition itself that scarred me. He seemed to be unable to speak from screaming so much, and could only look at me hopelessly as I entered the room. I was sickened, and turned away, but 701 did not like that too much. He made me look as he electrocuted the last bit of life out of the already wounded man.

I think I have finally made my decision: electrocution is the last way that I would want to die. ||::>

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[Sectus]

UNIT: 523
DIVISION: APEX
CLEARANCE: 05

Enter Password: **********

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<::|| So among several events, I have been promoted to the rank of 05 for the Combine Civil Authority. I must admit that while the training process was a long, grueling, and slightly horrifying process, it was indeed a worthwhile and fun one. 05 comes with many responsibilities, as well as privileges. For one thing, I get to carry a gun now. I was informed that the gun I was given was used by an 01 before me. It was used to take many lives, and I suppose that I will be taking many more now with it. Along with that, I am now able to patrol the streets on my own. I must be frank, it feels weird not having someone following me around all day. It's like the day that your mother finally stops holding your hand when you cross the street. The feeling is anxiousness, I would say.

Other than that, the only noteworthy events I can think to list are rather odd. First thing's first, an old friend of mine, Leuthen, as I have noted earlier in my logs, was hit by a tear gas grenade thrown by one of my commanders. It probably didn't help that he had heart problems, and 03109 haunts my nightmares. We were able to save him with the usage of oxygen, however. It helped to sustain his breathing, and returned him from a hallucinating state of mind. He was given pills to take on a daily basis, and hopefully this will help to sustain his lung problems.

Lastly, I encountered one of the strangest things I have seen during my time in the CCA: a dwarf. He was roughly four feet tall, and had a beard on him like a Christmas tree. Me and another unit moved him to the CWU hospital where we had saved Leuthen, and had him cut his beard. He seemed sentimental at first, and refused, but he eventually came around to the idea. There was a gas leak so we had to get out of there fast. I gave him 20 tokens as payment for his patience, and sent him on his way. The rest of the day passed without incident.
I look forward to tomorrow, my first full shift as an 05. ||::>

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[Sectus]

UNIT: 523
DIVISION: APEX
CLEARANCE: 05

Enter Password: **********

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<::|| I feel myself becoming colder, the further I venture down my dark path. More and more it feels like the only thing I can trust not to betray me is this log. I cling to this log, and in conjunction, myself. At the end of the day, this simple posting format is the only thing I can honestly trust to let know all that happened to me, even if I tend to forget to update it on a regular basis. Hopefully this coldness is just a phase during my time in the CCA, but I fear it may become a permanent mark of my psyche and attitude. At first I was unable to cope with re-educating citizens, but now it has become a second nature for me. Their cries of suffering no longer bring me pain inside. I still am not able to handle amputations, however. Rare is the occasion when I am ordered to end the life of someone, but when I do it always hurts me. I find it is much easier to kill someone who is running away. It is much easier indeed, for the fact that you don't have to look them in the eye. Look someone in the eye while taking their life, that takes nerve. Thankfully I have only been made to do it once.

Other than that, I find myself becoming less and less surprised by the daily activities of citizens, their complaints, and suffering. Rape seems to be a commonplace activity in Precinct Six (previously known as district six.) There was an incident during ration distribution today, myself being on Post One duty, I was in charge of checking citizens for foul marks. Two citizens were sentenced code three responses, and were detained. This is the first time I have dealt with someone that has a warrant out for them, but both citizens had UPA warrants on them. It was a bald male, and a small, shy looking female. As it turned out, it was a different individual that had actually committed the rape. I was unable to learn of the fates of either citizen, because I was called out of the RDT to deal with a situation involving a loose exogen.

Near the end of my shift for the day, I had asked Officer 211 to check my manifest to see if I was accepted for promotion. Unfortunately I was not. Prior to this however, I had detained someone for malcompliance level two. In the haste to see if I was going to be promoted, I forgot about the detainee, resulting in four cycles overdue. Some of my more sharp colleagues will notice that my new, shiny helmet is now charred, and burned at the top. While I do miss the shine and luster my helmet had, I do not hate the dark effect it gives my eyes. It is much more intimidating now than it used to be, and I can honestly say it is an improvement. How I got the burn marks is something I refuse to deliberate on any further, however. ||::>

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UNIT DECEASED
METHOD: AMPUTATION
EXECUTIONER: 03109
REASON: INSULTING UU CmD