Catalyst Gaming
General => General Discussion => Topic started by: .:KFrohman:. on May 25, 2011, 06:59:26 PM
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Some of you may have been aware of a recent conversation I had with Cupland. If you are, then you may know what this is about. If not, read on.
I know I've been a gigantic faggot lately, what with the whole OCRP debacle, but this is not just about that.
I'm going to list all the mistakes I've made. While I'll make the effort to ensure they are to their fullness, I cannot guarantee I have listed them all.
Let's start.
Orange Cosmos - The stupid shit I did.
- Abusing my powers
- Banning for stupid reasons
- Being a general dick
- The "Jamaica" Incident
- Attacking OC, eventually causing its' demise.
- Not being as useful as I could/should have been
- Not taking a break from the work
- Begging
- Being a needy cunt
- Misunderstanding my peers in certain situations
- Being a dick to Moonraise
- Causing disruption to the general populace of the community with my actions.
Catalyst Gaming
- Attacking the server over a small incident that got the better of me
- Being a dick to certain people (again)
- Causing disruption to the general populace of the community with my actions.
- Attempting to sell OCRP, and all the drama that spawned from that.
There are probably more things that need to be listed, but at this time, I cannot remember/recall/bring them to my mind for whatever reason.
Catalyst Gaming members, Ex-OC community members, what you see above is a list of all the mistakes I made and regret. I am sorry. For all of that. I'm not blaming anyone but myself.
I do not expect you to accept me into the community again, nor do I expect you to accept this, but let it be known that this is the guilt and regret of a guy who's caused a lot of grief, yet suffered some as a result. That is all.
Once again, I apologise.
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Tbh you'll never regain my trust. Idk what it is about you, but you must enjoy doing these things or you wouldn't do them. You've hurt many people, cause so much greif and destroyed a community with 18,000 members. So tell us all Kaz, Why the hell do you do it?
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Touching, I forgive you. It's not that you're disruptive, etc; it's just that you need more "self-control."
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Tbh you'll never regain my trust. Idk what it is about you, but you must enjoy doing these things or you wouldn't do them. You've hurt many people, cause so much greif and destroyed a community with 18,000 members. So tell us all Kaz, Why the hell do you do it?
You're going to have to elaborate. Which bit exactly?
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I like you Kaz. You're a good Unit in HL2RP, and you never abused your power there. I never thought you would do crap like this. I'm half and half on how I feel about you. Sorry.
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Tbh you'll never regain my trust. Idk what it is about you, but you must enjoy doing these things or you wouldn't do them. You've hurt many people, cause so much greif and destroyed a community with 18,000 members. So tell us all Kaz, Why the hell do you do it?
You're going to have to elaborate. Which bit exactly?
Everything that you posted. Why did you do those things?
I mean, im really trying to understand what motivates you to do these things.
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I never hold a grudge against people, But whatever triggers you to do this stupid stuff is what questions me, Kax.
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You're turning into PK, trying to manipulate people like this.
People must not know you at all if they think you really care.
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Everything that you posted. Why did you do those things?
Many reasons, I'm relying on you to put them to the list.
I've always been a bit power hungry. To be better than the rest. Whether that stems from autism or as a result of my poor track record in primary and middle school I do not know.
Managing my anger has been a bit of an issue. It's more of an issue when you're given the tools to completely ruin things.
As time went on, I've become more tense in a way, where even small things might just set me off haywire.
Sometimes I mis-understood people, or they mis-understood me.
More recently, I've been making decisions that have not been fully thought out, but then again, it's something I've often done. Normally, in a situation, I just go with what happens to be the quickest or simplest option to deal with it, without thinking through properly.
I hope that answers your question.
You're turning into PK, trying to manipulate people like this.
People must not know you at all if they think you really care.
Thanks for making me doubt my own thoughts. Wanna go ahead and close the thread while you're at it? >:(
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Everything that you posted. Why did you do those things?
Many reasons, I'm relying on you to put them to the list.
I've always been a bit power hungry. To be better than the rest. Whether that stems from autism or as a result of my poor track record in primary and middle school I do not know.
Managing my anger has been a bit of an issue. It's more of an issue when you're given the tools to completely ruin things.
As time went on, I've become more tense in a way, where even small things might just set me off haywire.
Sometimes I mis-understood people, or they mis-understood me.
More recently, I've been making decisions that have not been fully thought out, but then again, it's something I've often done. Normally, in a situation, I just go with what happens to be the quickest or simplest option to deal with it, without thinking through properly.
I hope that answers your question.
One last question. Do you enjoy it?
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It gave me some relief from whatever the situation was at the time, but the aftereffects would always come back on me. So yes and no.
You're turning into PK, trying to manipulate people like this.
People must not know you at all if they think you really care.
To add, let's think for a moment. If I didn't care, would I have gone to the effort of doing this? Would I really have asked waffle to unban me from here just so I could post?
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You really pissed me off back in OC... and idk if i can still go through that discussion... many things happened to me and it just ruined the fun...
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It gave me some relief from whatever the situation was at the time, but the aftereffects would always come back on me. So yes and no.
You're turning into PK, trying to manipulate people like this.
People must not know you at all if they think you really care.
To add, let's think for a moment. If I didn't care, would I have gone to the effort of doing this? Would I really have asked waffle to unban me from here just so I could post?
Yeah, cause nobody wants to talk to you anymore and you're hoping that this could get you unbanned from the server. And there's nowhere else for you to go.
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Kaz... the consequences are given... we can't just give it back... because you need to learn to not do this shit...
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Yeah, cause nobody wants to talk to you anymore and you're hoping that this could get you unbanned from the server. And there's nowhere else for you to go.
I was informed roughly by sabo that people didn't want to talk to me on the basis I never apologised for my actions, hence the thread.
Nice pointing out the obvious - Of course that's something I'd like, but the chances of that actually happening are slim, hence why I never mentioned it until now.
Kaz... the consequences are given... we can't just give it back... because you need to learn to not do this shit...
Read the last few lines. I never expected for that to happen.
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Yeah, cause nobody wants to talk to you anymore and you're hoping that this could get you unbanned from the server. And there's nowhere else for you to go.
I was informed roughly by sabo that people didn't want to talk to me on the basis I never apologised for my actions, hence the thread.
Nice pointing out the obvious - Of course that's something I'd like, but the chances of that actually happening are slim, hence why I never mentioned it until now.
Kaz... the consequences are given... we can't just give it back... because you need to learn to not do this shit...
Read the last few lines. I never expected for that to happen.
You can say whatever you want, but you still posted this just to post this without sharing the actual feeling. You don't care about people and what you do to them. You don't need any friends. (And I'm actually quoting you here)
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You can say whatever you want, but you still posted this just to post this without sharing the actual feeling. You don't care about people and what you do to them. You don't need any friends. (And I'm actually quoting you here)
I'm not sure how I'm going to "share the feeling" any better than I have now. What do you want me to do? I mean it's great you're assuming I'm not, but I'm at a loss as to how to possibly "improve".
You say I don't care about people and what I do to them, but that was because when I did the actions, I never looked at the bigger picture and how it might affect them. Surprisingly, to my knowledge, hardly anyone brought me up on it.
No comment on the last statement.
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You can say whatever you want, but you still posted this just to post this without sharing the actual feeling. You don't care about people and what you do to them. You don't need any friends. (And I'm actually quoting you here)
I'm not sure how I'm going to "share the feeling" any better than I have now. What do you want me to do? I mean it's great you're assuming I'm not, but I'm at a loss as to how to possibly "improve".
You say I don't care about people and what I do to them, but that was because when I did the actions, I never looked at the bigger picture and how it might affect them. Surprisingly, to my knowledge, hardly anyone brought me up on it.
No comment on the last statement.
I mean sharing the feeling that you expressed here.
Honestly, you're so mentally unstable that you actually believe your own lies Kaz...
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I mean sharing the feeling that you expressed here.
Honestly, you're so mentally unstable that you actually believe your own lies Kaz...
Are you suggesting that I'm not actually sorry? Well sorry if it seems that way but that really isn't the case. I am genuinely sorry.
As for the last bit, What do you suggest then?
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Kaz, after seeing what you did at OC, I would never let me trust you again ever, I trusted you back at PE, but after that I really gave up trying to be friends with you since it always seemed you didn't want to be.
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You can say whatever you want, but you still posted this just to post this without sharing the actual feeling. You don't care about people and what you do to them. You don't need any friends. (And I'm actually quoting you here)
I'm not sure how I'm going to "share the feeling" any better than I have now. What do you want me to do? I mean it's great you're assuming I'm not, but I'm at a loss as to how to possibly "improve".
You say I don't care about people and what I do to them, but that was because when I did the actions, I never looked at the bigger picture and how it might affect them. Surprisingly, to my knowledge, hardly anyone brought me up on it.
No comment on the last statement.
I mean sharing the feeling that you expressed here.
Honestly, you're so mentally unstable that you actually believe your own lies Kaz...
Darth. Darth, Darth, Darth. You truly are an ass.
Sorry that is a bit unprofessional.
From a professional standpoint, you are an ass.
Many people on the internet fail to remember that behind a computer screen is a human being, and that human being has feelings. This applies to not only you Darth, but it applies to everyone. Whether those people be the perpetrator, the target, or even the bystander of attacks.
And I leave you Kaz, although I have already said this to you, with Newton's third law of motion, as applied to the ways humans socially interact :
With every action, is an equal and opposite reaction.
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And with that, I have snapped. Someone find me bookings for coastal resorts in the UK please.
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Kazuo, I have known you for a while and I still have respect for you. You are still a great friend to me regardless of what happened. I can only wish that you could somehow make amends. But that seems highly unlikely, and I fear that you won't be unbanned.
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You can say whatever you want, but you still posted this just to post this without sharing the actual feeling. You don't care about people and what you do to them. You don't need any friends. (And I'm actually quoting you here)
I'm not sure how I'm going to "share the feeling" any better than I have now. What do you want me to do? I mean it's great you're assuming I'm not, but I'm at a loss as to how to possibly "improve".
You say I don't care about people and what I do to them, but that was because when I did the actions, I never looked at the bigger picture and how it might affect them. Surprisingly, to my knowledge, hardly anyone brought me up on it.
No comment on the last statement.
I mean sharing the feeling that you expressed here.
Honestly, you're so mentally unstable that you actually believe your own lies Kaz...
Darth. Darth, Darth, Darth. You truly are an ass.
Sorry that is a bit unprofessional.
From a professional standpoint, you are an ass.
Many people on the internet fail to remember that behind a computer screen is a human being, and that human being has feelings. This applies to not only you Darth, but it applies to everyone. Whether those people be the perpetrator, the target, or even the bystander of attacks.
And I leave you Kaz, although I have already said this to you, with Newton's third law of motion, as applied to the ways humans socially interact :
With every action, is an equal and opposite reaction.
You obviously don't know anything about kaz.
So please stay out of it.
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Him clicking his mouse button makes nothing else move though Nikolai...
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You can say whatever you want, but you still posted this just to post this without sharing the actual feeling. You don't care about people and what you do to them. You don't need any friends. (And I'm actually quoting you here)
I'm not sure how I'm going to "share the feeling" any better than I have now. What do you want me to do? I mean it's great you're assuming I'm not, but I'm at a loss as to how to possibly "improve".
You say I don't care about people and what I do to them, but that was because when I did the actions, I never looked at the bigger picture and how it might affect them. Surprisingly, to my knowledge, hardly anyone brought me up on it.
No comment on the last statement.
I mean sharing the feeling that you expressed here.
Honestly, you're so mentally unstable that you actually believe your own lies Kaz...
Darth. Darth, Darth, Darth. You truly are an ass.
Sorry that is a bit unprofessional.
From a professional standpoint, you are an ass.
Many people on the internet fail to remember that behind a computer screen is a human being, and that human being has feelings. This applies to not only you Darth, but it applies to everyone. Whether those people be the perpetrator, the target, or even the bystander of attacks.
And I leave you Kaz, although I have already said this to you, with Newton's third law of motion, as applied to the ways humans socially interact :
With every action, is an equal and opposite reaction.
You obviously don't know anything about kaz.
So please stay out of it.
I think you are sadly mistaken, however, I would like to end this here, because I see no benefit from arguing with you.
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Also Kaz dragged more people into failrp, and people who rp'ed into leaving the server.
I remember he used to get on and Kazbomb the whole BP, he would blow up cars for no reasons (Even in SRS rp) and he also just banned people because he either didn't like them or he just felt like it... He banned me when i was getting my car for one hour Reasons: ASS.
Srsly kaz... I don't even know if any offers are correct to unban you... you've caused many disasters to your OWN community... and even to Catalyst Gaming...
I have nothing else to say to you...
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Kaz, you are a monster in your doings. You as a person, are not a monster. You're actions however, are monstrous, and you failed to convince me that you did not see the errors of your ways. I know very well you did indeed know what you were doing, you even told me. Hey I can't say I didn't somewhat fall for it again, was even willing to again give you the benefit of the doubt!
After Darth, after me, after Moonraise, after SMT you just can not be forgiven. You drove the dagger from thou sheath to thy's community, and thus it did become your happy dagger's sheath as you stood happily on it's treaded corpse.
This is a failed attempt, you are banned for a reason, you knew better, and you do nothing but sway your disabilities around as an excuse after you have done wrong. You try to get away with everything because of some ideology that has been preached upon you in which you were taught through it to live as though your disability could get you out of anything. IT CAN NOT!
Hell I'll admit, you got a few people in your quest, but it ends here.
Kaz Vale.
Is es ut omnes, vos postulo Qui impetro succurro.
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Kaz, I've always liked you for some reason. You probably already known that I did considering I used to screw around with you a lot in PE and OC. However, I cannot believe that an owner/founder of a community could do the things you did to OC. Talking to Jake and Darth themselves, I heard exactly what went down. I cannot, in anyway, see RoflWaffle do the things you did back then.
And now CG...Why? You were the one who, whenever I joined a Skype chat with Rofl, would be having fun with us all the time. I figured you and Rofl were on the best of terms, and I'm unsure of why Rofl didn't have you as an admin at that time. However, I see now why. Personally, I can't completely forgive you for your actions, and nor can I ever trust you unbanned, but personality-wise, you seem to have changed. You realize your faults, and that's always a good start.
I figured you changed from OC when you came here. It ended up you turning your back on us too, so letting you back into here is something I, personally, cannot see happening.
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Kaz I love you. I think you should be able to play on the servers but you getting any type of administrative privileges should be a big no no.
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Look, this is going to sound odd, but I have nothing and everything to do with this.
I trolled a community, and i'm an idiot for assuming things'd their servers, and they kept giving me chances and I kept ruining them. I kept on trolling and trolling, and pretty much being a total ass. Eventually, I was handed a perma-ban. Believe it or not, this happened over the course of about 3 months, starting in November. It was a TF2 server.
Basically, my advice for you is to pack up your shit and go. I'm not trying to be mean, but it's the only way. I did exactly this, actually. I posted a whole long post on their old forums and explained all my mistakes, but trust me, it's no use. The best thing is to just pack up and leave. You need to reflect on your mistakes by yourself and not with the help of a community you disrespected, because it truly gets you nowhere.
What I'd recommend is trying to start over by finding a new server and a new community, and getting yourself a new start. It really helps, and just try not to repeat your old mistakes. Right now, I'm working on joining a new TF2 community, and it's going great. Treat people as you'd like to be treated.
All in all, there's no way you're going to be unbanned from here. No amount of pretending you don't care about being unbanned or banned or whatever is going to get people to think you're more mature. But that's okay. Think of this as a positive experience, and try to amend past issues.
Good luck.
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This is a failed attempt, you are banned for a reason
Excuse me but since when was this a ban appeal?
Whatever, my attempts to tie loose ends and perhaps re-rail things has obviously not gone to plan.
Oh and rory, What I did at OC shouldn't be a determining factor on things here. Stop acting like they are.
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You're turning into PK, trying to manipulate people like this.
People must not know you at all if they think you really care.
TBH hes hit the nail on the head there.
You wrote this same thread on OC asking for forgiveness saying oh i know ive made some mistakes and im sorry.
You have fucked up one to many times. Its clear you are untrustworthy as you either dont learn from your mistakes or you just dont care.