Whoever belives in this slenderbitch.

[crazily farting teacher]

He is not real, it was a photoshop contest *cough* proof *cough*:

Spoiler for Hiden:

T : Back In June 2009, 10th to be precise, what motivated you to join the “create paranormal images” kind of contest on SomethingAwful forums ?
VS : It was pretty spontaneous. I saw some of the pictures in the thread and just decided to make something that I myself would find creepy.
T : What was your sources of inspiration in creating your first two pictures dealing with a strange figure that you called “The Slender Man” ? How did people react to it ?
VS : I was mostly influenced by H.P Lovecraft, Stephan King (specifically his short stories), the surreal imaginings of William S. Burroughs, and couple games of the survival horror genre; Silent Hill and Resident Evil. I feel the most direct influences were Zack Parsons’s “That Insidious Beast”, the Steven King short story “The Mist”, the SA tale regarding “The Rake”, reports of so-called shadow people, Mothman, and the Mad Gasser of Mattoon. I used these to formulate asomething whose motivations can barely be comprehended and causes general unease and terror in a general population.
The reaction was suprisingly good so I continued making pictures based on Slender Man.
T : What was your reaction when people started creating pictures and stories about your newborn myth, in parallel with yours ? Did you think it would get that much popular and spread to others websites (4chan, Kongregate, Facepunch…) as quickly as it did, gaining the status of “Internet Urban Legend” and a meme ?
VS : It was amazing to see people create their own little part of Slender Man in order to perpetuate his existance.
I didn’t expect it to move beyong the SA forums. And when it did, I found it interesting to watch as sort of an accelerated version of an urban legend. It differs from the prior concept of the urban legend in that it is on the Internet, and this both helps and harms the status of the Slender Man as one. In my personal opinion, an urban legend requires an audience ignorant of the origin of the legend. It needs unverifiable third and forth hand (or more) accounts to perpetuate the myth. On the Internet, anyone is privy to its origins as evidenced by the very public Somethingawful thread. But what is funny is that despite this, it still spread. Internet memes are finicky things and by making something at the right place and time it can swell into an “Internet Urban Legend”.
T : Do you know about users “Ce Gars” and “KickYouInHalf”, or overall, the Marble Hornets project itself ?
VS : There have been a couple of e-mails, but I don’t know them personally.
T : Did you help with their series of video (to these days, more than 26 episodes) ? Was it more of a tribute to your work ? What was your reaction toward it and their own popularity as a series on Youtube ?
VS : I had nothing to do with their series of videos or any other that may have anything seemingly to do with the Slender Man. I’m keeping my projects close to my chest (in a plastic bag with the rest of my organs). I hope other groups create new concepts and make series of videos. Not necessarily a horror series or somehing about the paranormal, but productions using all sorts of subject matter and in multiple genres. I think the Marble Hornets project’s strongest point is showing what you can achieve with this medium.
T : One year later, people still seem to continue to like the Slender Man character, enough to make the Marble Hornets crew consider about a new season. Do you still get recognition from time to time about Slender Man ? Has that character changed your way of browsing the web ?
VS : I do on occasion, but I like it to stay mysterious (does interview).
T : Do you have anything to add on what has been said, or any last word you would want to say to the readers ?
VS : Before you had angels and succubi, and then ghosts and spirits, today we have shadow people and inter-dimensional beings. The Slender Man, and other newly created entities, are just the newest addition in the progression of a long, and very real, human tradition.
You’ve seen him, now you can’t unsee him.
T : Thank you very much again for your time.

http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/slender-man Better proof.

[Technical Abbreviations]

Youre an idiot.

[crazily farting teacher]

Youre an idiot.

It clearly says he made slenderman in a contest

[Technical Abbreviations]

Youre an idiot.

It clearly says he made slenderman in a contest

You dont know why...
Youre an idiot.
Im sorry, but that causes you to be...
An idiot.

[crazily farting teacher]

You dont know why...
Youre an idiot.
Im sorry, but that causes you to be...
An idiot.
[/quote] Prove I am a idiot

[swag master spiderman]

You dont know why...
Youre an idiot.
Im sorry, but that causes you to be...
An idiot.
Prove I am a idiot

You can't use quote properly 

[Technical Abbreviations]

You dont know why...
Youre an idiot.
Im sorry, but that causes you to be...
An idiot.
Prove I am a idiot

You can't use quote properly 

Yes

And you think people seriously believe in slender.

[tics]

Exactly. You're soooo stupid, Panda. Everyone knows that slenderman is fake, it's just a fun thing to talk about and pretend about.

[The Doctor, RIP Juggernaut]

Hey guys. Instead of insulting him why didn't you just tell him? I mean was it really needed?


Anyway, Slenderman was made as a joke, and the internet uses it as so.

We know it was a joke, no one really believes in it.

[Penguin]

Why santa isn't real. I just proved it bitches.

For the hell of it, Ima show of my mathematical skillz and prove Santa isn’t real, (No duh) but encase anyone still believes...you’re screwed

There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world.

However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish, or Buddhist (except maybe in Japan) religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the population reference bureau).

At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming there is at least one good child in each.

Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming east to west (which seems logical).

This works out to 967.7 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him, get back up the chimney, jump into the sleigh and get onto the next house.

Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purposes of our calculations), we are not talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks.

This means Santa’s sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second - 3,000 times the speed of sound.

For purposes of comparison, the fastest man made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a pokey 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.

The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized LEGO set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousand tons, not counting Santa himself.

On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that flying reindeer can pull 10 times the normal amount, the job can’t be done with eight or even nine of them -Santa would need 360,000 of them.

This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 54,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch).

A mass of nearly 600,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance - this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth’s atmosphere.

The lead pair of reindeer would absorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake.

The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reaches the fifth house on his trip.

Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from a dead stop to 650 m.p.s. in .001 seconds, would be subjected to acceleration forces of 17,000 g’s.

A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim considering all the high calorie snacks he must have consumed over the years) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo.

Therefore, if Santa did exist, he’s dead now.

..so, it’s not Santa. More than likely a rapist or something.