Chapter Nine: The mother.
Houston, Texas
1991, Christmas day
Matt grabbed the plate with the ham on it and started to move it to the table which his family was sitting around, as he pulled the knife up ready to carve it he looked up to the smiling faces of his family, then he noticed one of the pictures on the fireplace. In the picture there was a smiling young lady holding a baby in a rocking chair.
The smile started to fade from Matt's face as he looked at the picture, then he looked back to his wife, she had a concerned look on her face.
Matt finished carving the Ham and they started to eat with out a prayer.
As Matt was cleaning up the table his wife came up to him. "Matt, are you alright?" she asked.
"Yeah its just... It's been a while since I paid her a visit." he replied.
The next day.
Matt put his coat on and headed out the door and in to the car, there was a long drive ahead of him.
As Matt pulled out of his drive way he noticed his wife looking at him through the window with a worried look on her face.
An hour after he left, Matt pulled up to a large building surrounded by a fence, as he pulled up to the gate a guard walked up to him and said "Name, ID, and reason for visit." Matt complied with the guard and they let him in.
As Matt walked in the door he went up to the front desk, the Nurse behind it spoke to him "Here to visit her again?" she asked.
"Yeah, its been a while, how is she doing?" Matt replied.
"Shes a here and there, and her health is starting to go down hill, there's only so much we can do at a mental hospital." She stated.
"Shes in the cafeteria." She added.
As Matt walked away from the desk he could hear some mad rambling from the other side of the wall.
He slowly made his way to a check point where they gave him an ID badge and let him in to the wing.
Matt made his way to an older lady in a wheel chair staring at a plate of food with a blank expression.
He softly spoke as if hes trying not to frighten her.
"Hey, How have you been doing?"
In an old and cracked voice she replied. "You haven't been around to see me..."
Matt looked at the plate she was still staring at.
"Been busy... I'm sorry for not coming sooner its just... Finding the time."
She looked up from the plate and at Matt, giving him a weak smile.
"Hows Adrian?" She asked, as if she had suddenly gotten all better.
"Good, growing up really quickly, doing good in school as well." Matt replied with a smile on his face.
"That's good, how was your Christmas? She asked.
"Very good, We had Ham, They don't allow me to bring food anymore, I'm sorry."
"Oh its fine, Clinic still doing well?" She continued to ask.
"Yeah, we've expanded a bit, more people are moving in to our area."
Slowly the old lady started to tear up still smiling "I'm proud of you, and your father would too."
Matt reached over the table and took her hand "Mom... I hope you know that we can get you out of here, you don't have to pretend any more."
"That wouldn't be fair to you two, to have to deal with crazy old me."
"You shouldn't have to spend your last years in a mental hospital, we have enough money to take care of you..." Matt replied starting to tear up.
"Its fine honey, go be with your family, its whats important to you, just let me fade." she finished.
"I love you mom, I really wish you could see Adrian, I really wish you'd come with me." Matt said.
The Lady started to look at the plate again and seemingly to mentally phase out of existence.
Chapter Ten: The Mental War.
2017, Two miles from Ineu pass, Romania
Matt opened his eyes to loud foot steps out side of the cave he was meditating in, He sighs loudly and turns to see who is entering it knowing who it most likely is.
Matt spots Eli "Stalker" standing at the entrance of the dimly lit cave with his hands in his pockets.
Eli spotted Matt's blood shot eyes and realized that he hadn't slept in a very long while.
".. I was told i would find you here, but this... Is really not what i expected" Eli said.
Matt slowly gets up stumbling as he does so and ask "What do you need?"
"Isn't it obvious?" Eli replied.
Eli takes off his hat for a moment to talk to him "I need you back. We all do."
Matt Puts his face in his hands and rubs it.
As he slowly pulled his face out of his hands he said "Not ready.. Need to resolve a few things before I go back."
Eli sighs, looking at him detainedly and noting the pained expression on his face "... Anything I could help with?"
Matt gets up Brushing him self off "Nah.. Something I need to do my self, can't afford to let people see me this weak."
"You're not "Weak", Matt. Just human, like the rest of us." Eli said.
"Yeah well.. Since the whole thing with fourty-five I haven't been able to sleep." Matt replied
"And when I do... I have nightmares." He added.
"Sounds bad alright..." Eli replied.
Matt gets a rather depressed look on his face.
"I failed, same way Wong failed. I let a madman run loose and harm people." Matt said.
Eli shakes his head "No, you didn't... Just calm yourself a second and listen, ok?" He moves close to him, trying to get him to sit down on what little surface there is to do so on the cave.
Matt Shakes Eli off "Hell, Beans called him going rouge, just like I did with Achim." Matt stated.
"And I didn't listen.." He added.
"Matt. You had no way to know what he was going to do, not even i knew and i had dealt with him before" Eli said.
"Besides... You didn't fail anyone" Eli added.
"Thomas... Ali..." Matt quietly said.
Matt Sits down on the floor and looks out in to the snow storm.
" Whenever I close my eyes I can see them... Thomas.. Ali... Everyone I failed...
And Everyone who died because of me." Matt said.
Eli puts his hand to Matt's shoulder "Matt... Thomas is out there, finally able to act coherently thanks to you... Ali's still recovering but she's on it's way. And I probably wouldn't be here if it wasn't because of you.
Sure... Things didn't go perfectly. But you still helped people more than what most of us can even account for.
I can't keep the whole place working on my own man... They still need you. Fuck, I still need you there."
"I know..." Matt replied.
" I don't know why hes effected me like this..
Matt gets up and paces around the small cave.
He struck a nerve and I can't figure out which one."
"Believe me, you're not the only one who was shocked after what he did." Eli said.
"But that's just one more hurdle he put down for us" He continued.
"Yeah? Eli how long have you been out here?" Matt asked.
"I've dealt with hurdle after hurdle, Betrayal and defeat, I've lost basically everyone I cared about, Wasp is who the fuck knows where... And I'm lost.
Matt looked at the ground angrily.
I have no idea where to go from here, Outlands is one mishap away from a full blown war with each other, we're running out of supplies in the clinic, We have very few people trained to do really anything and the crazies keep becoming a bigger and bigger problem.
And even I'm starting to lose hope that we'll win this war." Matt ranted.
Eli puts his hands on his pockets again, looking at him with a worried expression.
"Matt... I can't guarantee you We'll win this
I can't even guarantee you things will be safe in Ineu
What i can guarantee you though is that all the things you just said WILL happen if you just stand idly by in this cave.
You can either stay here, do nothing and watch them blow up on their own.
Or you can come with me. Help them set things straight, and /maybe/ have a chance at actually gaining back what we've lost."
Matt sits down on a log by what appears to be a small fireplace and pulls out his revolver and looks at it.
"When I first left the city, my resolve was absolute. I was convinced I could save the world, I could make up for failing to protect the ones I loved. The more I fought for whats right, the more I realized the question.
Are we willing to give up our humanity for the sake of freedom from the combine... Or do what we think is right, and have a greater possibility of losing. The thought that kept me going was that I got to live a full, long life, and that it was my duty to try to let others have that chance."
"Well, so far you've done a good job at doing just that... Why stop now?" Eli asked.
" Hell... No one says that you have to go back into rebel work... A doctor is all some people need. A friend even in some cases...
You're more important than you give yourself credit for." Eli said.
"Its not that I don't give my self credit, its that... I don't think I'm a good enough leader for what they need." Matt replied.
"And what do you /think/ they need?" Eli asked.
"Someone willing to send others to their deaths. Willing to do what it takes to take back City 45.
Or whatever the hell it was called before." Matt replied.
"Maybe what they need is precisely the opposite, someone who knows the risks. Someone who knows the true value of human life.
Someone who won't just spend the lives of countless innocents to "maybe" get things done." Eli stated.
Matt chuckles a bit before saying
"Every life ever lost in the fight for freedom, Ever human life that ever has, or ever will live riding on our backs. And here we are, waiting for our chance to strike, to take earth back... Every war has its lesson, every life taken has its reasoning, no matter how bad. In all this, I think I forgot as long as those people in that pass are alive, they live free lives. It doesn't matter wither we take earth back or not, as long as one of us live a free life, the combine have failed." Matt ranted.
Matt looked up at the roof of the cave and sighed "I think I know what I need to do." He said.
"Eli, We're going to save the world." He finished.
Eli smiles "That's the spirit, Oldman. Now come on... People are waiting".
"You go ahead, there's one last thing I need to do." Matt replied.
Eli nods, putting his old hat back on "Right... I'll hold up for you ahead, but don't keep me waiting too long will you?" he says that in a light tone, leaving the cave with the same heavy footsteps as he did before.
Matt goes to the middle of the now dimly lit cave and starts to meditate again.